In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arany~

Ugh I feel so fucken tired..like I want to fall over right about..NOW.Why can't our christmas vacation start TODAY? I was soo warm underneath my blanket and then I saw what time it is..*groans*.Today is the dreaded english final..TWO HUNDRED questions.And we only have TWO hours,not even for 200 questions.

Ugh "Show me the meaning of being lonely" is on the radio.I hate that fucken song..It reminds me of my ex boyfriend..ugh I fricken loathe that song now.And again yesterday I got one of those stupid gift reminders from him in an e-mail..that was 2 damn years ago..I have to figure out how to cancel em.I don't need reminders of the shit I was put through.Aww now when a man loves a woman is on the radio..THAT'S better.Yesterday was kinda crazy.Especially at dinner..my dad didn't talk,mom kind of looked pissy so no one really said anything.I was ok i just didn't want to study and shit.

God I hate christmas time sometimes..in a way I like it..but I feel more lonely now than ever.Why can't I just be with Nate? It's not fair..why does life have to be like this.I JUST WANT TO BE NEAR HIM..that's all I want..GRRR.Santa Clause maybe you can do that? lol j/k.I go to sleep alone..I wake up alone..ALONE..loneliness sucks some ass.Not that i don't have someone it's just he lives on the other side of the country.I know patience patience Stacey.In April we can finally do some of the shtuff we've been talking about.But i guess i am lucky because I have someone that I love and that loves me back.My mom doesn't have that..she's TRULY alone.She has been more or less for 23 years.Poor thing..she needs to be happy.So I feel even worse for her right now.

Urgh I wish I could have been online last night cos I know you had a bad night Nate.. :( But we will get to talk on the phone tonight.I hope you like the shtuff I sent.I was going to put the poem I wrote for you in there but I'm not done with it..have to put some finishing touches on it.Now I feel horrible after I read your entry..really bad for you because of what happened last night.. :(.Today will be better..promise! :) Hopefully I can make you feel better later.That's my job as your girlfriend..well one of them anyway.Aww sweetie I love that song by Diana Ross..someday,we will be together..i'm sorry I couldn't be with you last night when you really needed me..I would have held you close to me and told you that everything will be fine and allowed you to cry in my arms.I want nothing more than that.. :(I am sure there will be more tears and hopefully I can be there by your side then.I never want to be the reason behind the tears though.

See now i am crying lol because you felt like you wanted to.I love you SOOOO much,baby.If you are ever having a bad night or something,call me..i'll always make time for you,you know that.Sweetie..I am crazy about you.I think about you every single second of the day and miss you every single second.Now thinking about it..I can't picture life without you..it's like a puzzle where the pieces are missing..it would be like a part of me is missing.The song "I can't live..if living is without you" really fits.I need you in my life,for always.

Just like you said,think of me through the troubles,struggles and hard times.No matter what,i'm always going to love you and be here for you.You are my world..my earth..my moon..my stars in the night sky.When you are sad I am sad.So try to smile.Keep your head up and hang in there honey.There will be lots of better days and better times ahead for you.We will talk later.I'll e-mail you later and let you know a good time to call.Again,i love you.Alright that's it.This entry was mostly about my sweetie only because I feel like he needs to read what I wrote the most..and he's more important than how my day went.If any of you want to know more about my day yesterday..ask.Peace out everyone.

Love,Stace.

Happy New Year!!! - 2005-01-01
new update @ LJ. - 2004-12-01
christmas card... - 2004-11-28
update on LJ - 2004-11-18
Happy Halloween!!!! - 2004-10-31

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