In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arany~

This is going to be pretty lengthy..

Sweetie..you said you needed some time alone.I really hope it wasn't from the attitude I was portraying after you told me about your grandma.I don't even know why I was acting like that,I had no reason to.It was soo out of character.I acted like it didn't bother me that we would be talking less..you know it did.Though i came off like i didn't care either way,I DID.It was just a stupid defense mechanism so you wouldn't see how I really felt.

Sometimes I act soo retarded.I have my moments..that was one.I guess the whole convo with Michelle got to me more than I realized.I hope that we are OK.I didn't want to start a fight and I have come to terms with the fact that that was soo fricken close to being our first fight.If you have to take over for your uncle,then that's what you've got to do.I shouldn't be so selfish and just accept it.

I'll miss you,but she can't be alone.I know you're sick and I feel like i've complicated things much worse for you.I hope you are not mad at me or hurt by the attitude i took on..cos that's the very last thing i'd want to happen.I need to be more open minded about a lot of shtuff.And i feel soo bad knowing that i almost set off our first fight.I never want to hurt you or cause you pain or make you feel bad for being the good person you are and doing the right thing.It is your duty to watch her and i don't want to get in the way of that.

I'm so selfish when it comes to you.I just want to talk to you ALL day for 24 hours 7 days a week and not have to share you with anyone..god is that un-realistic or what? I know there's going to be other people in your life who need you and your presence and time and like other things,I gotta deal with that.You have to go about your daily life,so do I.Watching her is going to include that and though it's going to screw up our conversations,i'll have to accept it.

I'm sorry for being such a well i guess in terms "jerk" which i can be at times.Sometimes the hardcore bitch in me comes out.I shouldn't have been sarcastic.I was just acting like a five year old girl.Which is pathetic for someone who is supposed to act like a young adult.If you don't forgive me,i understand.Again i truly apologize.I realize this is something you have to do so i'm not going to stop you.I love you and though im not thrilled..such is life.Just please don't be mad at me! I want everything to be cool with us and i won't sleep thinking it's not.K well talk to you tomorrow babe.

Stacey

Happy New Year!!! - 2005-01-01
new update @ LJ. - 2004-12-01
christmas card... - 2004-11-28
update on LJ - 2004-11-18
Happy Halloween!!!! - 2004-10-31

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