In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arany~

Song: Like a stone by Audioslave

Hey! I am back! yah! lol. This can't be too long..I have a bit longer to write today though..I have..20 something minutes.

Soo..on Wednesday we got report cards. It turns out I didn't fail math! I got a D! Can you believe that?! I really should have failed. I thought my math teacher was some mean bitch but apparently not. I can't believe she passed me! I really lucked out. I swear at times I think someone is watching over me. Well, overall I got a 3.4 for the quarter..that's really bad for me. Normally I get a 3.5 or a 3.7..stupid ass D!

Wednesday morning I was in really bad shape..I looked really really lost. Like my world just came tumbling down. My mom commented on it as she drived me to school and said I looked "pathetic" and to just move on and accept it and deal with everything. Then she told me about when she was younger and how she made her boyfriend choose between going to an out of state college or being with her so basically he told her to fuck off and get lost..so she lost him because she didn't realize that he was doing something good for himself and she was being selfish. So that kind of helped a bit.

I feel so much better! But i will get to that later.

I saw Julie again and promised her I would sit with her at lunch. Me and Katie talked..it seems she isn't as bad as I thought. I have a lot in common with her that I didn't know about. (=

Julie told me she got a DVD player the other day..how come EVERYONE has one but ME?! Grrr! She said she got Dawsons Season one DVD and she asked if I wanted to come over her house sometime and watch it. I won't watch it with her but I might go hang with her soon. She's one cool chick.

So wednesday was ok..caught up on shtuff in Keyboarding. See, the disk I was using was messed up and kept saying it was full and there's no space so my teacher FINALLY deleted some shtuff on there. I never realized how much utter crap was on there.

So I got home..and when I got home I SHOULD have left my phone on..for now on when I get home I am turning my phone on. Anyway, I was waiting for Nate on here and I never realized he called me and by the time I saw him online it was too late..well we talked a bit and started to go back to normal. I BEGGED him to call me though it would mean missing American Idol and Dawson's Creek..so he did..we had a KICK ASS conversation. Talked about nothing and everything for almost two hours. We had fun...we were sappy. We ended the convo on a great note and later that night and LAST NIGHT too I had good dreams about him. (=

Oh I forgot to mention on Wed me and mom got into a fight. I was not in the mood for her b/s. Well I was feeling better but not good enough to put up with her shit. I basically told her to screw off and leave me alone..which she pretty much did and is still doing. Anyway..

I found out on A Idol that Kim L, Carmen, and Trenyce were in the bottom three. I am SHOCKED! I really thought it should have been Carmen, Rickey, and though he's in the military and a GREAT guy! Josh should have been in it too. His performance was pretty bad. I heard though since Corey got kicked off they decided not to vote anyone off this week and that Kim L is safe but now it's between Carmen and Trenyce. I definitely think Carmen will be the one going. I heard that unless they have stellar performances..one of them will be going.

On Dawsons I saw a little bit of..it looked sort of boring. A lot of making out between Pacey and Joey..blah! lol. Come on Kevin Williamson! It's DAWSON and JOEY who should be together though then again Dawson is a bit..fruity..lol.

Yesterday let's see..math sucked..lol. We took THREE pages of notes..it was nuts. Veryy boring class. In third hour we took a test..I think I did ok. I overheard some guy's convos sitting next to me..it was so disgusting. I can't stand immaturity as it is. Oh yeah so me and mom were really quiet on the car ride to school. Anyway, fifth hour was fun..I laughed a lot. Art was alright..I am now drawing sea creatures..to me it's better than painting.

Then I got home..mom told me that she needed to use the fax machine and the computer to take a test and she would need it for a while. So she finally let me on..me and my fuzzy talked a bit..twas a good convo for that reallly short time. Then she made me leave..I kept checking to see if I could go online but of course not. We got into yet another fight because she asked me to set the table in kind of a cold way so I told her why should I do her any favors after the way she treats me. So then she made me do the dishes..guilting me saying that they would just "sit there." So I of course felt bad..and she used the computer for the rest of the night..grr..I hate her at times.

I ended up getting to see The Challenge..it was really interesting. Ayanna and Blair left. Damn it! I really liked them both. Then I listened to some of my fave music..danced around like a nut jub..lol..did some homework and then I saw Friends. I don't know if it was an old episode or not because I haven't seen Friends in a while.

I went to sleep after that..and now here I am. Tomorrow is SAT's. Gah! lol. I found the little ticket thingy I need to bring with me. It said that I also need photo ID, pencils, and a calculator and I should be at the testing site (my school) between 8 and 8:15..god is that early or what?! So tonight I will be going to sleep early. I am not even sure about what time it ends so I have to take my cell with me.

I think tonight I am going to look through my SAT prep book just to see the type of q's that will be on there and get myself ready. Anyway, today at school should be fairly easy. I want to thank everyone who has been giving me constant support and making me smile and feel better. You all rock! And I will be there for all of you too if you should need me. *Hugs to everyone on my list.* (=

Sometimes we need people to make us see things we don't see..to give us a whole new perspective. Friends are the greatest things anyone can ever have and you guys are the best friends any girl..especially this one can have. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I'm so glad it's friday! fuuck yeah! lol. oh..we were talking about something in my 5th period that made me think..I never told anyone this but my parents and whole family thought I was going to be a boy before I was born..lol. But then the doctors said "noo..it's definitely a girl." lol. They even had a boy named picked out for me..that might explain a few things about me..heh heh.

So i've rambled long enough. (= Have a great friday all!

Sweetie..i'm soo sorry we didn't get to finish our convo! :( I love you and we'll talk later..for sure! My mom won't be home from 6-7:45..so hell yah! :D

This plug goes to openthegate who is going through some rough times. Note her..whatever..just make her feel like she's not alone. Peace out!!

"Tomorrow is the most important thing in life. Comes into us at midnight very clean. It's perfect when it arrives and it puts itself in our hands. It hopes we've learned something from yesterday."--John Wayne

Happy New Year!!! - 2005-01-01
new update @ LJ. - 2004-12-01
christmas card... - 2004-11-28
update on LJ - 2004-11-18
Happy Halloween!!!! - 2004-10-31

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