In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arany~

Song: I found someone by Cher

Hello readers. (:

Well, I've been butting heads with my mom lately and this morning it just came to a screeching halt and I couldn't take it anymore. So I showed I was the better person, sat down..had a loong talk with her and as a result, we are getting along a lot better and have reached an understanding.

I had no choice because this morning she was annoying me more than ever and yesterday she frustrated me to tears and I was extremely upset. I just lost faith..I lost ME. And I don't want that to ever happen again. I told her how I feel, what she needs to change about herself, that I know why she threatens me [so she can have power and feel that she's in control..and how it's not going to do SHIT], how she KNOWS how to push my buttons, and to just stop with the shit because I just don't feel up to it and I don't think us at each other's throats is not going to help any. She took into consideration everything I said and seems to be making an effort to change, god I hope so because SOMETHING has to change. Then she told me how she feels, so I can know who she is better and it really helped and I am VERY proud of myself right now. I feel like a mature adult. Scary, huh? lol.

So, it's a new month. And every new month I just feel renewed. It's kind of like a new year, an opportunity to start over and be refreshed. Pretty soon i have to look for a job. My mom was on my ass yesterday and If I DON'T..she'll drag my ass out to get one. I had some MORE odd dreams last night. This time it was about Chris, and I also had a dream I was in Arizona...yep Nate..lol. I'll tell you about it later.

Besides that..not much really happened. I watched a bit of Now and Then, played music, talked to Nate, watched TV (Dawsons..what else..lol)..did much of the same things I did over the weekend. You know the drill. I watched Fear Factor..ewww..they had to be covered in worms..FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS..it was so revolting. They can only breathe through a tube thing with their mouth closed and had to untie a HUGE knot with only their hands in a minute and a half. Neither of them untied it so they had to go through a spinning wheel that goes fast and get flags. If they got all 14 flags, they'd get $50,000. The guy beat the girl and got 4 or 5 flags and she got three. So he got $25,000. Damn it! I wanted the girl to win.

I also saw Road Rules..yikes! lol..It is soo funny because their mission is to have the guys strip..at a gay strip club! And since Abe is homophobic, that was a real challenge for him. The girls had to promote the guys and write up flyers and shtuff, and they get rated on a point system and have to do some dances.

Abe and Donell butted heads and Donell was trying to piss Abe off and trying to get him to admit that he's racist and stuff. They started fighting..first with words and Donell called Abe "ignorant" and a "montana red neck hick" or something so then Abe kept walking in and out because Dave was trying to be in the middle and hold him back from kicking Donell's ass.

Then Abe comes back in, and makes a joke about corn bread and admits it's racial so of course Donell gets ANGRY and provokes Abe to the point of him pounding Donell's ass and throwing the first punch despite Dave's lame attempts to hold him back. So they fight, and the Road Rules producer comes in and says that someone might have to be kicked off because fighting is against the rules and Donell AND Abe got to tell their sides of the story and they asked the Road Rulers if they'd be safe and can move on with them around and they can't come to a decision so they had them watch a video tape of it, and it's going to continue next time.

My opinion..they are BOTH at fault, but I have a feeling Abe is going to go home because he couldn't control his temper, though I feel that Donell wasn't helping by bringing it upon himself and pushing Abe's buttons, so he had no other choice but to beat the shit out of him. He was just saying little things to annoy him, so I guess he brought it on himself though Abe was wrong to get violent. They were BOTH in the wrong. Dave tried to save the day, but it didn't work out. Mary Beth's confused, Cara seems confused so I guess we'll have to see what happens. Real World tonight! Woo hoo.

Anyway, wtf is up with all these celeb deaths?! First it was Gregory Peck, then Katharine Hepburn, now today it is Buddy Hackett. My mom said my grandma grew up with him. Aww. I guess it does all comes in threes. It's so sad how everyone is just dying. :( I can't help but get sad when I hear that SOMEONE has died. Ugh.

I have decided I am going out today though I feel like complete shit! yes, you read that right..after FIVE days..Stacey is getting the hell out of here. Hell, I don't care WHERE I go, I just need to get out. I need some fresh air. I've been cooped up far too long..and I don't care HOW I feel, I need to get out. I am deciding between the movies, the park, or getting a CD.Woo hoo..4th of July in three days. (:

Well, I gotta get dressed, get out of here and mail something. When I get home I am going to continue cleaning my room. When I did the other day I found some strange ass things. It's odd the things you find when you're not looking for them. Then after that I might make a few changes to my diary, add some shtuff..I'll see..then take a shower because I was too lazy for one last night.

Well, buh bye ya'll. I think there was a lot more that I wanted to say but I'll save it for tomorrow. Have a great Tuesday.

Baby..GOOD LUCK..I'll call you tonight. Me loves you so berry much. (K's)

"Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen."--Winston Churchill

Happy New Year!!! - 2005-01-01
new update @ LJ. - 2004-12-01
christmas card... - 2004-11-28
update on LJ - 2004-11-18
Happy Halloween!!!! - 2004-10-31

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