In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities. ~Janos Arany~

Song: Wherever you will go by The Calling

Hellloo! Well, I haven't updated since Saturday mornin', so it's time for another one..definitely.

The weekend has pretty much been a mixture of things..it's had me feeling sad, happy, frustrated, depressed a bit, a bit lonely, etc. Ohh..I updated my Playlist and Currently thing by the way.

Saturday was as you know, me and Nate's anniversary. Me and mom DID go to Brandsmart. I got myself a new walkman. It's pretty cool..hell, it even has a flashlight..lol. Ok, I sound like a complete dork..but anyway lol..she got a vacuum for the car, and vacuumed some of the sand out from last week.

After that, the weather was complete shit so we got home. Me and Nate talked online for a loooong time, till me and mom had to go out for dinner. Of course "they" got into a fight because I was online, and we waited too late to eat. We went out for ribs..yummm! Luckily my dad didn't go with us. then I promised Nate i'd call him, which I did. :) We had a good anniversary except for a minor little fight, but of course we are fine now..like always.

Then yesterday I didn't do much. Just mainly stayed home all day..listening to music, talking to Nate, and doing some cleaning in my room. It's really tough to go anywhere with this weather, and yeah it's kind of depressing.

I can't wait tomorrow for Michelle Branch's new CD..woo hoooo!!! :D I'm sure it's going to be awesome.

Anyway, onto my feelings..I am a bit depressed I guess you could say. I am sure I'll get out of my "funk" soon, but it's so tough seeing everyone happy, having fun times when I am just kind of watching as life just goes by. It seems that everything is going wrong. The computer was being a complete bitch this morning, etc etc. and just little things going wrong like things breaking around here.

I realize that I sound more and more boring with the more entries I write..ughh..blahhh. I'm thinking about taking another break from this diary till I have something INTERESTING to write about. Of course, I am still going to read diaries, and the difference this time is I will be writing to everybody. I just think I am going to take another break from writing in this diary.

I think I am going to get back into exercising again. I did sixty stomach crunches yesterday and I think I'll do sixty each day..it will be good for me, and make me feel good. I just..don't know anymore. I'm starting to question things. Life just feels routine to me. I've been sooo moody lately. I don't feel like..me. Where's the excitement that life once had for me?! I just want SOMETHING to change. I'm not looking for drama, I am just looking for the slightest thing to happen to turn some things around..to shake things up. I'm just a bit lonely. :( I want more than what I am supposed to have in life. I don't know if that's such a good thing, but no matter HOW good my life becomes, I am never going to probably be fully satisfied with what has been handed down to me. I want to know what it feels like to be good in my own skin, and just not overanalyzing for once what is wrong with me..etc etc..to not overthink. I just want to be carefree for once. I feel like I am starting to take some things for granted, though I need to stop.

I need some adventure..any kind of adventure. I'm just bored with the way things are. Don't get me wrong..I am happy with Nate..but I just wish certain things weren't the way they are in other areas of my life. I am searching for just that little something right now for me to look forward to in the next month or so. It seems like everyday it's the same thing..my mom bitches at me, it rains, the computer gives me problems, something falls apart, there's conflict. I just want that "perfect" day, if there is such a thing. A day without conflict, a day where everything goes right.

Blah..I guess that's the end of my ranting for the day. I hope these storm clouds lift for me..both outside, and literally speaking. I hope everyone had a good weekend. Road Rules is tonight. (: Yah. Buh bye ya'll.

Sweetie..I'll talk to you when you get back. GOOD LUCK today!! I am hoping for all the best for you. Don't forget..no matter what news you get, don't be apprehensive about telling me. I'm always here for you. I love you so much.

"Doubt whom you will, but never yourself."--Christine Bovee

Song: To be with you by Mr Big

Happy New Year!!! - 2005-01-01
new update @ LJ. - 2004-12-01
christmas card... - 2004-11-28
update on LJ - 2004-11-18
Happy Halloween!!!! - 2004-10-31

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